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Writer's picturealunrhys

2020 - A Year of Depression

It has been 9 months since my last blog entry, and in all that time I have scarcely even looked at any of my web pages, let alone edited or added to them. The reason for my lack of activity has been - as you may well guess - related to the story of the year, the Covid-19 pandemic. Not directly related, because to the best of my knowledge I haven't contracted the disease. Certainly I haven't been majorly ill with it. Rather, the problem has been the restrictions the disease has imposed on me. Self-isolation and social distancing have been the buzz words of the year, and although I've never been one for much socialising, the current restrictions have had one huge impact on my life. I have not been able to visit my fiancée in Thailand. All flights have been cancelled. I was due to visit her in March en route to Japan for the cherry blossom show, and then we were planning to get married in the summer. Instead, it is October and I am still single, still waiting, still wishing. With no family or friends to visit, almost the only people I've seen face to face (or mask to mask) this year have been shop staff. I've been lost in my own thoughts, and many of my old anxieties of loneliness and depression have returned, and with them an accompanying lack of motivation. That lack of motivation has extended to my web page writing. I've spent the year on social media, watching television, and pottering about in the garden, but doing almost nothing else. I've almost forgotten how to use the editing and composition tools on this site. More will follow about Wanna and about my writing.

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